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Posted: Wed Dec 14, 2005 10:08 am
by Lotus
I was raised Catholic.....even went to Catholic schools.

The short version of the story:
I did not like the people I went to the Catholic High School with. They were very hateful and pompous people. They were hypocrites.
Although I was not Pagan yet, they nicknamed me Satan. The seeds for questioning were already there.

BB
Lotus

Posted: Wed Dec 14, 2005 3:25 pm
by forgotten oceans
I was never raised baptist, but my grandpa tried (he's a preacher, one of the worst). Dad didn't want me to be baptist out of spite for Grandpa(for a better explanation I posted on him before under Fundie, topic: couple of fundie xperiances), but he didn't care much for the pagan thing either. He's insecure, jealous, and believes women are property, so any ideas that weren't his or involved any type of freedom or equality were kept from me as long as possible. The man put me on lock down as soon as I turned 13, and that's why I left at 17. On top of Dad, the other reason would be because not one single adult I knew would want to talk with me and answer questions that I had, most got skittish and changed the subject, some started to get condemning and told me to quit asking, but no one answered me, so I went looking for my own answers. The look on adults faces when they say something about the rain and an 8 yr old answers back ' yeah, I know, I called him here, I sang him his favorite song and he came to listen' Grandpa was not happy, he kinda freaked and Grandma just kinda smiled. heheh and that's the reason I'm me and not what society expected me to be, I like knowing what I believe in and why. If I'm gonna die for my beliefs, (I have this bad habit of standing up for what I believe in, I'll probably get shot for it one day) I'm gonna make sure I know what they are and that it's not just my little happy bubble, but real warm and fuzzy and honest beliefs deep down in the pit of my heart and I'll call it spirituality! *steps of soap box*

Posted: Fri Dec 16, 2005 2:53 pm
by Chelle
Well, i was christened C of E but no religion was ever pushed on me. My Dad is atheist and my Mum has never really said any thing about it. I don't no why i chose this path... i cant explain it. It just felt right i guess. None of my family is religious. Very strange. It is something that we don't really talk about... :-?

Posted: Sun Dec 18, 2005 3:40 am
by Rissa
I was born and Raised Catholic. Christened when i was a baby. My parents are Catholic and I was confirmed in hmm.. 8th grade, I believe. I went to a Catholic high school.

I have always been one who never really fit in with the ppl I went to church with. I recall trying to make up sins for confession because, frankly- I couldn't think of one thing i'd done wrong when i was 9 or 10.

I felt closer to nature and to animals (especially dogs). I looked into Paganism at the local library. At that time the best I could find were a few books on witchcraft which my mother found. It scared her to death and I was forced to take them back.

Although I did have a few problems with attending church. (never went). I didn't really start questioning my beliefs again till my son was born with birth defects that he nearly didn't survive. I remember praying in the small chapel that the hospital had. I couldn't grasp how God could let children suffer. I tried talking to a priest there, but he didn't help. I was taught that God was all loving- all light. there wasn't a dark side.. so why was this happening? to punish me in some way? or to punish him for something i'd done?

It was then that I'd started reading the bible for the first time. I'd found so much wrong with catholicism (in my eyes) that I couldn't follow their beliefs anymore. So i started seeking another doctrine.. another church. I wound up at the church of Christ. but when I noticed that women were virtually silent and never did anything but follow a man's lead I started questioning again. Back to the trusty bible.

I thought OMG.. how could God be so cruel toward women. We're unclean after we have birth? twice as long, of course, if we give birth to a girl. we're to be silent in church until afterward - when we can ask our husbands about anything we had questions on. I began to question whether the bible was really God's words or mens beliefs.

I had also had problems with the way one doctrine was better than someone elses doctrine. It was like the battle of the christians. My parents were wrong because they were Catholic. To be wrong was to be damned.

There was always that big push to be baptized- without it there was no going to heaven. Natural sin was another something I had problems with from the beginning. How can a child be born bad? Why is it that there's this magical age that's the cut-off limit where you must be baptized or God's done with you. It's a constant battle to redeem yourself just so that God will here your prayers. I can't stop the way that I feel. I might can hide my feelings, I can work with on the way that i feel and try to understand why, but for me love, jealousy, plain old anger and lust are a part of who I am.

I left the church and that's the day I started really understanding myself- Though I still have soo much more to learn.

Posted: Sun Dec 18, 2005 1:25 pm
by Ragnar
Rissa. Welcome to the library, first off. I only saw you first today. I am still having trouble with being notified of posts, even my digest did not turn up today (ANY MODERATORS LISTENING :-D )

Na so, Rissa. I found your posts very interesting;

"I left the church and that's the day I started really understanding myself- Though I still have soo much more to learn."

Then you are in the right place. :-D. I can see how you may have gone down like a lead baloon at church.

Two things they hate more than they do us;

1) People that think and question.

2) a good memory. It does not do to have the audience remembering what the priest said this week was totaly opposite to what he said on the same subject two and a half years ago, now does it?

Enjoy yourself here. :-D

Re: Not chosing cristianity

Posted: Wed Dec 21, 2005 11:45 am
by gwmRNpozSC
Loke wrote:...to walk another path than their upbringing expected from them. Im just curious when it happened...
Let's see. I've described (I think) my past. Not sure if it was here, or not. Yes, I was raised Lutheran/Charismatic/Assemblies of God/Church of God/Foursquare/Pentecostal Holiness/Baptist, etc.

Used to say I was "mutt," like mixed dog, when asked "What denomination are you?"

It definitely developed over a slow period of time, but started in my pre-teen years.

Sitting in a Caticism class where a girl across the table kicked my legs until my knees bled, finding myself always an "outsider" and ostracized by the "in" crowd in the "youth" group of churches, seeing different denominations compete, condemn each other, brag, make false claims, lie, and be all too self-serving.

It all had a bearing from my pre-teens into my 20's.

By the time I was in my 30's, I just was blank, empty, for the most part.

One day, when I was in my late 30s, I started studying Wiccan. I don't know exactly why, but I know that being online, and researching it, made me think about it.

Now, I'm one of those not-quite Wiccan spiritualist people. I really don't quite fit personally comfortably with the god/goddess thing and having to tell a spirit in a tomato that I'm going to pick it from it's vine and eat it, and things that intense.

But I DO believe that god/cosmic consciousness/etc is either dual male/female, or transends beyond that. I do not think of "god" as really male.

I just don't get too much into the duality of it, keeping up with which state the moon is in, etc.

I cannot, in good faith, say I'm Wiccan, because I'd be a sorry example. Not that I'm in any way "anti" Wiccan, at all.

I believe fully in spells, white light, and a whole slew of it.

I came into my own about it, far more so, I'd guess after mother's death.

That's when the stereo started turning itself on, and somehow, I didn't think anything about it at all. I thought it quite natural. Well, once I got accustomed to it, because it did it for quite a while.

The first few times, it did startle me a lot.

From then, on, my feelings about Christianity were that it has truth, but is not fully truth, and that it also has a lot of lies in it.

Just my person thoughts on that.

Yes, it really culminated then, strongly, for me, and that would have been only back in 1998.

There were a lot of callous, if not insane, rationalizations, yes.

About the so-called "Laws" of the OT? We were told it was because of "health" issues do to "unsanitary" conditions in those days. Well, yes, most of them did promote "better health," but how could an ALL-KNOWING & EVERYWHERE-PRESENT & LOVING God NOT have the ability to merely tell "his" people that do do these things would be good for their health, and that he wanted them to do it this way, because he cared about them, instead of INTIMIDATING THEM WITH FEAR?

About 22 years ago, I asked a minister about all of those people in the deepest darkest parts of Africa who lived their entire lives without every "hearing the gospel message," and he said that THEY TOO WOULD BURN IN HELL, but that God was being COMPASSIONATE on them by NOT letting them hear the "gospel message" because he KNEW that they would REJECT him so by NOT letting them HEAR it their PUNISMENT in hell would be LESS SEVERE.

Uh huh.

And WHAT of the people he KNEW would REJECT him, and did, whom he LET hear it?

Playing favorites?

They cannot see the lack of their reason.

Posted: Sat Dec 31, 2005 8:43 pm
by Galaxy Girl
You don't have to be a Christian to choose Christ. In fact, there is so much in Christianity that is anti-Christ that it's pitiful. Christ transcends all religions, and He wouldn't join any of our churches today any more than He joined the Pharisees 2,000 years ago.

All the churches do is give people some structure and opportunity to socialize, and sometimes make people aware that even if no one is watching, God is, and God sees. Hopefully that makes people think before they do stupid.

Re: Not chosing cristianity

Posted: Sun Jan 01, 2006 3:08 am
by Rain ForestMoon
gwmRNpozSC wrote: .........About 22 years ago, I asked a minister about all of those people in the deepest darkest parts of Africa who lived their entire lives without every "hearing the gospel message," and he said that THEY TOO WOULD BURN IN HELL, but that God was being COMPASSIONATE on them by NOT letting them hear the "gospel message" because he KNEW that they would REJECT him so by NOT letting them HEAR it their PUNISMENT in hell would be LESS SEVERE.

Uh huh.......

The more they seem intent to send as many people as possible to "hell", the more we should stay away from them.

Blessings

Posted: Sun Jan 01, 2006 9:49 am
by Kelreth
Its so funny hearing the loopholes that they come up with

Posted: Sun Jan 01, 2006 3:47 pm
by Odbe
I wasn't really raised religious, but I was sent to Anglican scripture from when I started school. It wasn't until year six we were even told scripture wasn't compulsory (and as kids, we didn't have the idea that there was religious freedom) and this was when the scripture ladies were having such a hard time I think they might have been just a bit relieved to get rid of some of the non-believers. So since I was 5 I had been taught Christianity the same way I was taught mathematics. I didn't even know there were different religions, except subconsciously remembering hearing about Muslims and Jews. It was just believer/non-believer. It left me very uncomfortable for a while, because Christianity didn't suit me, but I didn't know there were alternatives. I wanted to be Atheist, but I still thought I was going to hell. I kept giving it up, then asking forgiveness and coming to church, then going again. A vicious cycle.
So, long story short, I started looking at other religions and ended up pagan (though very loosely so).

Posted: Tue Jan 10, 2006 12:14 pm
by auramoonsongs
My up bringing was well a bit unusual my mom comes from Jewish roots but because of the war her family took on the christian faith as a cover so she kind of brought me up a Jewish christian if that makes sence and my dad is just plain c of e well I new that the faith I was brought in wasn't for me I could feel it I just couldn't get it then when i was thirteen I met a wiccan girl at school and she told me about her belief's and I began to read about it and inside me said this is for me and so I became a wiccan, I was 14 at this point and I love it. I have a five year old little boy and because i don't want to push a belief on him he is being brought up to know pagan/ wiccan and christian so when he is old enough he can make his own mind up about what he wants to be.

Aura moonsongs

Posted: Tue Jan 10, 2006 1:51 pm
by Crazy Healer Lady
I have a five year old little boy and because i don't want to push a belief on him he is being brought up to know pagan/ wiccan and christian so when he is old enough he can make his own mind up about what he wants to be.
That is really really wonderful to hear ^___^

Posted: Tue Jan 17, 2006 3:20 pm
by Kitsune
For me, I was brought up Christian (or how do you write it Xtian) but I never understood the religion...things that seemed exceptionally important to me, were either not considered or seen in a way that I considered blasphemy.

When I was 9 or 10 I developed what would become a lifelong obsession with the supernatural. I read every book I could find, but never really considered changing my religion. My Mom thought it was an unhealthy and weird hobby, but my father supported it.

When I was in High School I actually met a Wiccan who followed the "Circles" path. I suppose I must have known Paganism was a religion before, but I'd never considered it such. I started considering if I believed their religion more...It certainly was a lot closer to what I believed in. I began doing pagan rituals and my beliefs just formed naturally, but I refused to "officially" change my religion, because I wasn't going to be one of those kids who changes their religion to paganism for no better reason than to piss off their parents. If I was to do that, I might as well continue following the Catholic religion, because it wouldn't mean anything to me spiritually.

Finally, about 5 years ago, I went to church on Christmas Eve, and had a spiritual revelation... I had just spent an hour in church considering pagan thoughts that I believed in and I didn't feel guilty or anything. That was the moment when I first realized that I was pagan and that there was no going back... and that I was happy with my choice.

Posted: Tue Jan 17, 2006 6:00 pm
by Kystar
Christmas is a great time for those revelations, because so much of the meaning and the decor of the holiday was taken from various pagan faiths.

Posted: Tue Jan 17, 2006 6:08 pm
by Kelreth
Christmas basically is pagan. people just see it through a cross shaped veil