Kitty and wedding/family issues

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Kystar
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Kitty and wedding/family issues

Post by Kystar » Sat Aug 26, 2006 3:44 am

Image
Okay, I'm really here to ask for my cat, Noche. She wasn't eating all last week, so we took her to the vet. She has open sores in her mouth, a possible cavity and gingivitis. She's not really drinking much right now, but she HAS started snarfing her wet food. (Which is amazing, since she always HATED wet food, she even eats CHICKEN FLavored now, which she wouldn't touch before!) We've only had her on the antibiotics for two days...so I'm hoping she'll at least lose the worst of the infection soon. But she still needs a full cleaning and probably a tooth pulled. After her bloodwork is back.

Now, we get into the wedding/family issues. We're getting married in November. My family and I have been arguing about the guest list. Since WE'RE the ones paying for it, I keep trying to weed out the ppl who I barely know. My family won't let me. Three screaming fights. NOw, my cat's work very well might cost us the backbone of our savings for the wedding. I found out yesterday that my mom believes that my dad thinks we have $20,000 we're hiding, and that's why he won't give us any money. I am getting SO FREAKING SICK of being in the middle of my family's gossip-mongering, and having one of my THREE family members say "Well Mum says you said," or "Sister said you said". and they NEVER get what I DID say RIGHT! :banghead: :banghead: :banghead:

Now, I have to find out what my dad thinks and why my mom believes that...and why someone is trying to Scr**w me AGAIN!

GROWL! :evil: :evil:

Okay, so I'm asking for healing to the cat, and I think maybe strength to me so I dont' KILL my family? THANK!

Noche, first, though. I miss her jumpin on my head in the morning. [-o<
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Earth Daughter
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Post by Earth Daughter » Sat Aug 26, 2006 4:44 am

First off may I just say, aww pretty kitty :cat: :love10: ! Sending blessings her way. And don't worry one of my pets (horse) had to have a tooth pulled and I don't think that she felt anything, of course she was so drugged that she couldn't walk, but still.....
And secondly best of luck with your family. I know they can be annoying but your kinda stuck with them, eh? I'm sure everything will work out.
Good luck!
Blessed be.
Always forgive your enemies - Nothing annoys them so much.

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Post by Crazy Healer Lady » Sat Aug 26, 2006 9:36 am

[-o< Noche is on my list!! I hope she feels better fast :(

As for family, well, isn't it funny how you love them so much you could just dump a pot of boiling oil on them??? >__< I cannot stand gossip. It only leads to something terrible.

Good luck with the family. And remember: One day at a time. Work out each little problem one at a time (baby steps), and soon your big day will come, go, and be remembered as one of the happiest (and most stressful) days of your life
Crazy Healer Lady
Health and happiness to you!

The purpose of a relationship is not to have another who might complete you, but to have another with whom you might share your completeness. -CWG

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Post by Stormy » Sat Aug 26, 2006 12:50 pm

Kitty is definately in my thoughts and prayers and sending a bit of energy for her to do with as she will - I know how it is when a fur baby isn't feeling well, they are like family, sometimes even MORE than real family ;)

Family issues - my best wishes for you - I deal with them myself with a mother and sister so toxic it's unbelievable and a mother in law and brother in law who are nothing short of evil in what they try to do to others. I know it can be so upsetting, I used to destroy my peace of mind over them to the point of making myself sick. My mil almost destroyed my marriage...

I don't know if it's an option you can take or are willing to consider, but in our case the only thing that has worked is to completely sever ties with his entire family (haven't seen them in almost 10 years) and to refuse to go see my mother and sister (who thankfully live four hours away). In fact, I had to tell my mother and sister in no uncertain terms just 5 weeks ago "There is nothing I can do for either of you, I don't know which of you to believe because you both tell different stories." I haven't gotten a call from either one since and I'm not planning to call them either. Saddly, we cannot chose our families and even more saddly, sometimes the only way to find peace is to break from them completely.

Some people are truely toxic and completely cutting them out of ones life is sometimes the only way to deal with them. Honestly, after cutting our familys out of our lives, we've never been happier.
Stormy ~~}~}-:>
Aut viam inveniam aut faciam

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Post by Kystar » Sat Aug 26, 2006 7:48 pm

Honestly, I've come to the conclusion that as far as my family goes, which unfortunately inlcudes a bunch of cousins and stepsiblings, my wedding in canceled. According to my Antaine's family, we're dropping the guest list in 1/2 to account for money trouble.

I'm not dealing with it. The can just go away. Far away.

Sigh. "I am the cat who walks alone and all places are alike to me," is how I look at my family. I'm the odd man out...so be it. Let them live their selfish, petty little lives. I'll find my path elsewhere.

Good news on the kitty front, she has taken her meds with some grace today, and there is eveidence that she was eating some of her high-protien kitten chow, in addition to some wet food. She still needs a cleaning and what-not, but her major infection of the mouth seems to be healing up a bit.
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Post by Kystar » Sat Sep 02, 2006 8:23 am

Change of plans, thanks to my best friend.

We've put a call into our hall, to see if they can push the wedding into next year, and apply the deposit we've already given them to then. If not, I think we might have to outright cancel it.

With Tony changing jobs and Kitty being sick, we just can't afford anything right now.

The Plan, as it stands, is to go to the JP in October so that I can qualify for full benefits thru Tony's new job; then have our Ceremony and our Reception in '07, after Tony's out of debt and has a year under his belt at the new job.

Hopefully, this will work out. Sigh. I'm crossing my fingers.
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Post by MettaPax » Sat Sep 02, 2006 10:53 pm

Well...

[-o< Prayers for Noche most defiinately! [-o<

[-o< And Prayers for you and your love. [-o<

Sounds like the newset update may help you both to have a better celebration for your union than with the circumstances you face now. GOOD LUCK! :-D
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Post by Willow » Mon Sep 04, 2006 11:32 am

I hope Kitty is OK
Blessings to her!
Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.
Dr. Seuss (1904 - 1991)

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Willow
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Post by Willow » Mon Sep 04, 2006 11:32 am

I hope Kitty is OK
Blessings to her!
Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.
Dr. Seuss (1904 - 1991)

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Kystar
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Post by Kystar » Mon Sep 04, 2006 12:35 pm

Kitty is doing a bit better. She still needs to get a tooth pulled and a full Level 2 cleaning, but she's eating and drinking and playing...and taking her meds...so good things on that front. Thanks for all your thoughts.

Wedding was successfully postponed a year, and we currently have an email into the Registrar of Wills to find out what hoops we have to jump through to get legally married soon...so cool beans. THe application is alreday mostly filled out, we just have to finish it, take it downtown, file it and pay the fee, then we get our license, and have to find where to go to actually BE married. Sigh. HOpefully, we can get our ducks in a row for the day I want, October 13th. Tee-hee, Friday the 13th! doiknow:
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Post by Lotus » Tue Sep 05, 2006 3:12 pm

I got to this one late and am happy that things seem to be working out for you guys.
I hope all goes well for the kitty too.

BB
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Post by Ragnar » Wed Sep 06, 2006 1:21 am

Kystar wrote: I think we might have to outright cancel it.
Well, good luck to you and your cat.

IF you DO have to cancel the wedding. I would not let the family know the real reason, but use it as revenge.

I would "arrange" another discussion aboput guests, and at the right point blow up and say "Right, well I will bloody cancel it then, we are paying, we say who is coming, you don't like it NOW you don't have to worry IT'S OFF! And it's ALL YOUR fault. Happy now are we?".

Sweet, sweet revenge. :finga:

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Post by FyreGarnet » Wed Sep 13, 2006 1:49 pm

Blessings to you both for the ceremony working out with the new plan. Besides, have a little ceremony at the JP isn't so bad. You won't have to worry about your parents bickering and such. And you can invite a couple of your closest friends or family and just tell the rest there isn't room for them, so you said no to anyone but the "witnesses."

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Kystar
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Post by Kystar » Wed Sep 13, 2006 2:11 pm

UPDATE!

Kitty is scheduled for surgery on Sept 19th.

The JP ceremony is scheduled for Oct 13th.

Now, just paperwork remains!
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Willow
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Post by Willow » Thu Sep 14, 2006 11:20 am

Good, I will try to think of you on those days.
Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.
Dr. Seuss (1904 - 1991)

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