In case you care...

Kinda like a prayer chain ...
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Vetle
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In case you care...

Post by Vetle » Sun Apr 24, 2005 9:01 am

OK, I feel really embarrassed doing this but I don't know where else to do this.

This morning I got up and I got an e-mail. It was the one e-mail I've been fearing for so long. It's over. It had never even started yet now it's over. I made a complete mess of my life for her and now she tells me that she hasn't been in love with me since March. I can't believe how much I gave up for her; how much I sacrificed.

I don't even know how to put my feelings into words. And I can't keep going on because my parents are right outside my door and I can't let my mum catch me crying because she yelled at me last time she did. That and she never knew about this in the first place and I would be in deep trouble if she did.

I just can't believe everything I've done just lead to this. I made alot of irreversible changes in my life that I'm really starting to regret now. I had so many plans. I built my entire life around this. I don't know what to do now. It's all fallen apart. I've nothing to hold onto anymore. My karma's finally caught up with me and I've nowhere to run from it.

I never finished writing the lyrics for my last album. I don't think I'll be able to write them now. Now it's time for my next one. I was thinking it would be an album about closure. I thought my sixth would be my last. "Og rosenne dør" (and the roses die). I guess the title is still fitting after all. Gods, I don't know what the hel to do now.

If you'd like to help, please pray that I have the strength not to crawl back to the bottle like I used to do. That and pray for her. I don't hate her. I wish her the best and hope she doesn't feel too guilty about this.

Thank you for your time.
"I just hope angels in the forest
Saw me praying in my own soul
Death is unfair - That's real pain
Remoun you...Am I almost dead?
I miss my hope; My will to live
My last farewell forever, all alone"

-Anita Auglend

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Rockhopper
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Post by Rockhopper » Sun Apr 24, 2005 9:24 am

I don't know what else to say, except that I'm sorry... I've had the same thing happen to me, though under different circumstances of course. He told me that he loved me, and then I got a phone call and he told me that he never loved me, that he only said that because he wanted to believe that he could love, and that he had found it, on top of that, he wanted me to meet her.

All of that aside, all I can really say is please don't go back to the bottle, it makes any situation much worse than it needs to be. I also think that you should finish writing these lyrics, it will put your mind on something constructive, and writing is a good way to get your emotions out. I'm a musician as well, and it can be very therapeutic.

As one last note, a friend of mine used to say: "Everything's okay in the end, if it's not okay, then it's not the end."

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Raven
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Post by Raven » Sun Apr 24, 2005 10:57 am

Rockhopper that happens to be one of the common sayings around here, and one of my personal favorites. Anyways, Vetle, Stay strong. Don't turn to alchohol (or other drugs for that matter) they never, ever help. Just remember that something good will come of this, you probobly just can't see it yet. Be patient, and stay strong.
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Rockhopper
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Post by Rockhopper » Sun Apr 24, 2005 5:09 pm

I forgot to say in my last post, don't be afraid to cry. It's a wonderful way to get out all of those pesky emotions that will just eat at you. Also, you will feel a whole lot better afterwards...

I hope all goes well for you

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Lotus
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Post by Lotus » Sun Apr 24, 2005 5:32 pm

Dude, that sucks. I've been there though and yes, one learns to get past it. I wish that I could be more conforting but, nothing I could ever say would make it better. Only trust that this experience will make you stronger in the end. You are in my prayers.

BB
Lotus
I have not been the same since that house fell on my sister.

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Post by FyreGarnet » Sun Apr 24, 2005 9:00 pm

Oh, honey, I'm so very sorry. Lots of hugs to you. My heart dropped when I saw your first line. But it will be ok in the end. I have faith dear. And know that you can always send me a message. Online or offline.

FyreGarnet
The difference between cats and dogs is that dogs want to smell everyone's rear and cats want every one to smell THEIR rear - unknown

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Kystar
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Post by Kystar » Mon Apr 25, 2005 5:10 am

Ouch, I'm so sorry.
I've been dumped via email before...it's not pretty. Telling someone it's over like that is a bit cowardly in my opinion.

Don't slip into the darkness, stay strong and have faith that everything happens for a reason.

you have my compassion and my good wishes.
You say "Witch" like it's a bad thing!

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morgana
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Post by morgana » Mon Apr 25, 2005 6:37 pm

I'm sorry to hear that happened to you Vetle. I have a friend who is about to go through this very soon, so I am bracing myself for it, cuz I warned this person but they chose not to listen. At any rate, I hope you'll have the strength to make it through this without resorting to alchohol. Rockhopper is right, writing is good therapy, and so is getting lost in a really good book. I'll send some good vibes your way. [-o<
"Love like you've never been hurt."

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Post by Fairydust » Tue Apr 26, 2005 12:45 pm

...Oh my goddess. All i can say is stay strong. I know so much how it feels, to care so much about some one. Even if its just me and my best friend...i really understand. It all happens so fast. But it will get better. This is the most depressed Ive ever been and Im guessing the same goes for you. But I know well both make it. Because that what we do. We overcome. Look...Ive been having a depresion problem (Most of you all know) And it seems like your the same...I know how hard it is to try and be ok when all you wanna do is cry till you wither away. I honestly do. But there are other people...and you can still be happy. Trust me. Its a lesson we need to learn. Its something we dont understand. Hey...lifes complicated (If I could Id say another word) but we can be strong. We can make it through trhis and I know youll be ok again. So just hang in there...and look for the light. Its gonna be ok...

:hug:
<b>lets just let ourselves be what ever it is that we are</b>

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Maelroth
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Post by Maelroth » Wed Apr 27, 2005 9:27 am

Take a deep cleansing breath grasshopper and know that the Gods tho cruel in our limited opinion sometimes, we know not what is in store for us. Stay strong, stay in the light and all will become more fortunate down the road. If you wake up each day and thank the divine for still being able to breathe then it is not the end. As hard as it is you must grab your proverbial bootstraps and get up and keep going.

Sounds trite coming from someone who is not feeling/going thru what you are. But find the simple joy of being alive and don't let the scat get you down.

My prayers and support, we're here to help each other my friend.
Lighting a candle and asking for the blessings you need to help you thru. [-o<
Not all who wander are lost-Tolkien



Religion is like a finger pointing to the moon, we must not get so involved in the finger that we forget where it points.



Maelroth B*B!

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Rain ForestMoon
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Post by Rain ForestMoon » Thu Apr 28, 2005 1:14 am

I'm sorry to hear that this has happened to you, Vetle.

Difficult to know what to say in the way of words of comfort. But those of us who have been in the same situation (and most of us have) know that eventually you emerge as a stronger person.

Also, as a male, remember that it takes a MAN to weep....

Keep in mind the signatures of two members of this board here, which are very appropriate to your situation at the moment:

"The world is round and the place which may seem like the end may also be only the beginning."

and

"Love like you've never been hurt." (when the time comes again).

(I'm sure Stormy and Morgana won't mind me quoting them.)

Look after yourself, Mate.

Blessings
RainForestMoon

"Excess of anything is bad, but especially the excess of Moderation"

"AQUILA NON CAPIT MUSCAS'

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2Crunchy
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Post by 2Crunchy » Thu Apr 28, 2005 5:40 am

I'm so sorry. :-(

There's really nothing more I can say that hasn't already been said. I'm sending some positive healing energy your way.

And although it's just a cyber hug, it seems like you could use one....
:hug:
Come to the Dark Side.....
We have cookies! :)

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Vetle
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Post by Vetle » Sat May 21, 2005 11:27 am

I'm leaving the forum. I've found a forum for norwegian pagans and I realised that's where I need to be. I have to start making some contacts and such to avoid deportationa after my studies. I might have to do some things that aren't exactly in my picturesque dream of the future but such is life.

I was thinking of coming back when I was well but I think I'll be forgotten by the time I'm well so there's really no need for me to do so. I think you're all a great bunch and hope that you can all get past the weird tension that seems to be underminding the forum.

If anyone considers me a person whose company they'd like to frequent, you are more than welcome to my contact information in my profile. You might have to get a little creative and be patient, as my computer's completely shot right now and I'm usually invisible when on a messenger service, though.

I might be back later (and might lurk now and again but I don't want to spread my negativity around)but I'm not sure and it might be a while if I do. I will eventually start to miss using English, I think. I might come back when I've completed my search and fixed my life and all. Now it's time for me to go find someone special so I don't have to elect someone less than special when my time runs out. Bye.
"I just hope angels in the forest
Saw me praying in my own soul
Death is unfair - That's real pain
Remoun you...Am I almost dead?
I miss my hope; My will to live
My last farewell forever, all alone"

-Anita Auglend

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Librarian
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Post by Librarian » Sat May 21, 2005 7:56 pm

We will miss you.

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Raven
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Post by Raven » Sun May 22, 2005 10:27 am

I agree.. you've become a part of this board whether you like it or not
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