Just wanted 2 no wot u think- may not b suitable 4 young ppl

Is a love spell really the equivalent of rape?
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Crazy Healer Lady
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Post by Crazy Healer Lady » Thu Dec 15, 2005 4:47 pm

Dads saying that stuff is just creepy and really evil.
Luckily my dad hasn't said anything like that to me, but he does have a bunch of incest porn >_< (creepy, please burn it for me I won't go near it)
My dad isn't that bad. He used to get a little violent but my niece has calmed everyone down, except my sister who uses her to scream at all of us and then blame us for making her cry when we haven't even opened our mouths.
ah hem, small rant there.

It's good that you can feel pity rather than anger for a lot of the time towards your dad. And it's so nice when you run into those good people that give back a little faith in humanity, men who aren't pigs and are genuinely nice and respectful, people who will open the doors for others (especially the elderly) and hold it open if you are coming toward them.
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The purpose of a relationship is not to have another who might complete you, but to have another with whom you might share your completeness. -CWG

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Post by Kelreth » Thu Dec 15, 2005 6:08 pm

.....I dont think any more than 1 of me can exist in a given area. There is a distinct chance that one of us would not live very long....

Though the thought of many mes working together is both amusing and disturbing
i am prone to free association. Basically whatever i think i type, so sorry if things get really erratic...

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Post by Willow » Thu Dec 15, 2005 8:22 pm

Wow,
unfortunately leaving the US would not stop it, it happens all over Asia and India, and I am sure in Canada and the south. Sex tourism is huge. there are mail order brides who get shipped to Canada and the US who practically become sex slaves because the government does not enter the bedrooms of the nation. (Not that I want GW in my bedroom anytime soon).
As for the punishment, I think castration with a rusty saw then a lemon juice bath should do it (Sorry for the image guys).

There are a few organizations that stop this stuff, another good way to help is to report anything when you find it, and to write your government representatives with facts, make an issue out of these things. I know this because one of my good friends was in Cambodia for much of the summer and he felt powerless to help these girls, so he just started writing letters to newspaper's. Almost none got published but he gave it a shot.

And as for bad Dad stories, I feel for you girls. There is nothing worse than belittling a child because of their sexuality (meaning treating them differently based on gender), the same goes for parents who try and teach their sons to "be a man". Won't even go there.
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Post by Crazy Healer Lady » Thu Dec 15, 2005 9:13 pm

There is nothing worse than belittling a child because of their sexuality (meaning treating them differently based on gender), the same goes for parents who try and teach their sons to "be a man". Won't even go there.
And learning that your parts are dirty and disgusting and don't touch them because you'll grow hair on your palms and that any boys' parts are perfectly fine. Hey ya lets laugh when that 4 year-old boy whips it out. A 4+ year-old girl does it: "NAUGHTY GIRL! BAD BAD BAD!!!"

Sorry. I've finally worked out the fact that being a woman doesn't mean I'm sick and evil and should be ashamed, and I see my sister trying to teach my niece to be embarrassed and ashamed in little discreet ways. She doesn't see it, of course. She was raised the same as me and doesn't see the flaws.
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The purpose of a relationship is not to have another who might complete you, but to have another with whom you might share your completeness. -CWG

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Post by Kystar » Thu Dec 15, 2005 10:02 pm

I hate to sound like a broken record...which I do at times...but that sexist attitude goes back to the "Eve tempted Adam on the Word of the Devil so Women are EVIL!" that is taught by most christian/catholic churches.
You say "Witch" like it's a bad thing!

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Post by forgotten oceans » Fri Dec 16, 2005 5:10 am

The up side to all of this is that we don't have to spend thousands of dollars in therapy, we already know what's wrong, and I don't wanna sound like an Oprah show, but it really is our parents fault, well, part of it.

I guess I was kinda lucky that I had it so hard, if not me, it would have been someone else, and maybe they might not have handled it so well. If I look at it objectively, I kinda like who I turned out to be, and that probably wouldn't have happened if not for the environment I was raised in. C.H.L., take your sis for example, Kystar, you too, I know you've got a sis, would you rather be like them, or do you think you've come out on top just a little higher? (Not trying to put down your family or anything, just examples.) Or how about friends we know married, single, kids, barren, all of them, you ever look at them and think that it's a good thing that survival of the fittest is only in the office and the rough parts of town because you doubt they'd make it. How about random people in the store or the mall, you ever get behind the large group of blond, late teens early twenties, loud, way too much money that's not theirs but their parents, spoiled, naive, 'the world is rainbows and sunshine', girls and I have to know, what's the first thing you think? Is it ' damn, this is so annoying, I hate this' or 'damn, what I wouldn't give to be that stupid again, look how happy they are, like hutch bunnies, stupid, soft, pretty, hutch bunnies'

I think we should all write letters to Bush, if he'll start a war over oil and politics and call it democratic freedom, maybe he'll start one in India for real personal freedom. There's a chance, right?

On a side note, I don't think foreign authority's, presidents, kings, ambassadors, prime ministers, etc, should be allowed to stay in 5 star hotels in the upscale side of cities, I think they should be put in the crappiest Ramada or Motel 6 possible, that way they can see how things really are and not that facade of 'look, we're upstanding, aren't we so great, we're rich, so ignore all our faults'

And about women being evil, men are just getting nervous, last I checked, and I could be wrong, but last I saw, women out numbered men 2:1. If this keeps up, and we ever out number them say, 5:1, I'm all for a hostile over throw :snakeman:
Maybe now you're starting to understand that while I may have been born predispositioned to be pretty batty, my parents saw to it that it was a certainty and completely unavoidable. -Me

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Post by Kystar » Fri Dec 16, 2005 9:45 am

Actually, I have to say, that I was raised in a very Feminist Household...to a point.

My mom divorced my dad when I was 5, and only dated twice...so I really grew up with my Mom and my Sister.

Now, no, I'm not glad I turned out like my sister...because her opinion is that "Fitting In" is the most important thing...she used to lecture me about my dress and attitude during school because
"Didn't I want to fit in and be accepted?"
I told her if dressing like a French Prostitute was Normal, I'd rather be a freak! She went on to become a teacher...elementary kids...main focus art...but yet she couldn't understand the Plays I put on with my dolls? :scratch:

Unfortunately, My mom was very retro in what she thought girls should be interested in, which curtailed some of my education opportunities...because she wouldn't authorize the paperwork. I wanted to go to the Vocational Tech school to learn carpentry or maybe mechanics...but she wouldn't sign the papers because "those aren't women's careers. Go be a nurse or a teacher!"

Which brings us to the current point...the way we're raised to believe that Women are somehow less than men.

I think you're right about the outnumber thing, Oceans. But our society still thinks too masculine. For a woman to make it in most careers, she has to distance herself from her feminine energies!

As for the fluffy bunnies...they'll get their wake up call...when they have to live in the real world. I have a friend who's STILL waiting to get her reality check. See, she went into the Navy out of High School...and despite the fact that she's seeing the world...she really hasn't had to grow up, though she THINKS she did. After all, fighting to keep a house and pay the bills in an unstable economy isn't something she ever dealt with...but I have been dealing with it...for years! And yet, she still thinks she's more mature than I am! Sigh.

Oh well, random rants are over...sorry about that! :)
You say "Witch" like it's a bad thing!

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Post by Chelle » Fri Dec 16, 2005 3:20 pm

I'm sorry but when i hear about stuff being done to kids it just makes me so damn sick with rage!!!!!! :rock:
Now i do not believe in the death penalty and i am glad that it can not happen in the UK BUT..... when i hear of stuff like this it does make me think....
Any one who even thinks about stuff like this should be locked away FOREVER!!!
Sorry about that....
Be what you are and not what other people want you to be!!! xxxx

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Post by Rain ForestMoon » Fri Dec 16, 2005 4:51 pm

Kystar wrote:Actually, I have to say, that I was raised in a very Feminist Household...to a point.
My mom divorced my dad when I was 5, and only dated twice...so I really grew up with my Mom and my Sister. .....Unfortunately, My mom was very retro in what she thought girls should be interested in, which curtailed some of my education opportunities...because she wouldn't authorize the paperwork. I wanted to go to the Vocational Tech school to learn carpentry or maybe mechanics...but she wouldn't sign the papers because "those aren't women's careers. Go be a nurse or a teacher!".....
I would not call that a feminist household. I think "all-female household" would be a much better description. There is a vast difference.

Kystar wrote:......Which brings us to the current point...the way we're raised to believe that Women are somehow less than men......

This is a great problem.
And it is part of a wider problem. We are conditioned to think in terms of dichotomies: Good/Bad, Less/More, Us/Them etc. etc. This makes life very simple. But real life is just not so.
Just because two things/ideas/people/whatever are DIFFERENT, it does not mean that one is better than the other.....

So, the idea that Women are less than Men (or vice versa) is actually a totally ridiculous idea.

Just as it is a ridiculous idea to think that (say) piloting an aircraft is somehow a more worthy activity than cleaning lavatories or collecting garbage. Yet many people think exactly that way.

Ideas like these of course are perpetuated by those deriving advantage from them.

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Post by Crazy Healer Lady » Fri Dec 16, 2005 6:34 pm

So, the idea that Women are less than Men (or vice versa) is actually a totally ridiculous idea.


=D>

Ridiculous completely and accurately describes it, doesn't it?
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Post by Kystar » Fri Dec 16, 2005 10:27 pm

Actually, my Mother and Sister were very feminist in all views, except one...careers! I'm sorry I didn't make that more clear.

Neither my mother nor my sister bought into that woman's place crap EXCEPT for certain career choices.

Any career choice that involved slightly dangerous physical exertion was really considered a "bad idea" and "not appropriate".

However, when I was bound and determined to go into Technical Theatre, they smiled and backed off.
You say "Witch" like it's a bad thing!

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Post by forgotten oceans » Sat Dec 17, 2005 4:08 am

Rain ForestMoon, I couldn't agree with you more!!!!! =D> Hey Kystar, 3 words for your mom, Rosy the Riveter!! She could do a hard days work and still look pretty at the end of the day!! :thumbleft:
Maybe now you're starting to understand that while I may have been born predispositioned to be pretty batty, my parents saw to it that it was a certainty and completely unavoidable. -Me

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Post by Lotus » Sat Dec 17, 2005 4:41 am

My mother clearly treats my brother differently than she treats me....even today. All this different treatment stems from gender differences.
I noticed she makes more excuses for him than me. If I do something wrong then "I'm bad and should have known better" or I hear "you deserve what you got". With him however, its always "you have to protect my baby boy...he has had it unfairly hard in his life. Everything that happens wrong in his life (or whatever he does wrong) is because he had it hard" crap. :cry: I am always forced to bail him out of his problems. Sometimes I am forced by her to do things that I find unethical to bail him out or am expected to bend over backwards and sacrifice for him. He is not expected the same for me.

Christmas holiday is a prime example: I cannot drive in on Christmas Eve but, can make it Christmas Day. My brother will be there for Christmas Eve so, all of the *good* food will be served on Christmas eve and I am expected to "eat the scraps the next day since she is sure that there will be leftovers" which, I know my brother....Every year he eats and hordes the best of everything leaving nothing good.
This is not the only time she will do something like this nor is it the only time she ever has done something like this.

She wonders why my brother is 30 something/unwed/unemployed loser who causes his own problems by being a womanizer/user/egotistical jerk.
He had a good job that he lost because he was stupid and dated (used) a woman he worked with....And my mother is all shocked that this woman sought to get revenge on him for using her!!!! #-o
There have been ex-girlfriends that he would enrage to the point where they took it out on us.

Ooh, though If I behaved this sort of way as he does I would be considered a slut. [-X

Forgotten Oceans:
"How about random people in the store or the mall, you ever get behind the large group of blond, late teens early twenties, loud, way too much money that's not theirs but their parents, spoiled, naive, 'the world is rainbows and sunshine', girls and I have to know, what's the first thing you think? Is it ' damn, this is so annoying,"

I see this all of the time cause now its popular for young girls to act stupid.....Like Paris Hiltion or Jessica Simpson.
Speaking of Oprah, Resse Witherspoon was on talking briefly about how this stupid act does great harm to women and the women's movement.
Yeah, this is what our grandmothers struggled for....the right to act stupid supporting the female=stupid stereotype.

I have to stop now or else Ill continue,
Lotus
I have not been the same since that house fell on my sister.

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Post by forgotten oceans » Sat Dec 17, 2005 6:29 am

Lotus!!!!! I'm sorry your brother's an ass :-( If you want you can have X-mas with us!!! I'm fixing potato salad, dressing, deviled eggs, pecan pie, and as a main, egg rolls, egg rolls that are so stuffed full of goodies they're fat squares instead of slender rolls mwahahahah :badgrin: Also there maybe ham.... And if that wasn't tempting enough, it's all from SCRATCH!!!!! MWAHAHAHA MWAHAHAHAHAHAH :badgrin: :badgrin: um, yeah, sorry, got carried away.

My dad's the same, he was so disappointed when I was a girl instead of a boy, but did he let it get him down? Heck no! He just worked me twice as hard to make up for it. I was the only girl in school that got to shovel dirt and gravel and do all the yard work for 2 acres of just yard and was lucky he didn't make me do the rest of the 45 acres and then still do house work too!!! There were times I'd be working on the drive way when we first started on it, he'd sit on the back of the truck and drink beer and after a few hours ask if I wanted a break, usually because he was bored and wanted to go back in the house, and if I said yes, he'd tell me to go clean the house or fix him something to eat while he was online. I usually said no outta spite, that way he'd be miserable in the heat too :thefinger: If/when I have kids, they're gonna be so lucky, I'm gonna be a way better parent then my dad!!! I'm still for corporal punishment though, but only on major stuff, like robbing banks or selling drugs or guns.
I can hear it now, 'MOM!!! All the other girls get to drink!! Her parents will be at the party!!' 'Darn it ______, I said no! If you wanna drink you have to stay here!! If you wanna drink with your friends, let me talk to their moms and see what they say and you can all drink in a well supervised and safe area. I don't want you going off getting drunk and then getting raped and/or killed, so here, here's 20 dollars, take your brother to the movies, and stay with him!!! I'll know if you don't!!! And I will be checking the movie times, so you better come straight home!!! Remember, I am Mom, I know EVERYTHING!!! If it involves you or your brother, I know about it!! That includes the dent on my driver side door too, what, you thought I didn't know? We'll talk later, take your jackets, it's chilly out.'

Hey Lotus, if I remember correctly, you're security guard type of employment, right? So you probably hit hard, right? He IS your brother, right? You know, every now and again, a good butt kicking is just what we need. I'll admit it, every now and then, I purposely go and pick a fight, just because I know I need one. Like tetanus shots, you need one about every 7 yrs :lol:

Sorry, I'll quit rambling now...
Maybe now you're starting to understand that while I may have been born predispositioned to be pretty batty, my parents saw to it that it was a certainty and completely unavoidable. -Me

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Post by morgana » Sat Dec 17, 2005 8:32 am

Forgotten Oceans, I know what you mean about the spoiled little girls walking around with designer clothes and bags, they're in my store all the time, and I just wanna smack them! I just don't get why it suddenly became fashionable to be rich and stupid, but it's very depressing. I saw on one Dr. Phil show where some mothers were putting themselves in the poor house while trying to afford all this designer stuff for their kids!! My mother would have laughed in my face if I had asked for a Louis Vitton purse, and these kids literally demand it!! I do lay the blame on the parents for that one, cuz I was never raised with that attitude, though I do realize that the designer stuff is suddenly what is so desirable in society. If I would've acted that way though, my mom would've had me donating the stuff I DID have to charity for Xmas!
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