The Pagan Library
Fri, Nov 28 2014

The Real Old Time Religion

tune: "Old Time Religion"

Anon


(Chorus):
Give me that real old time religion (3X)
It's good enough for me!

Asatru And Odinism:

I hear Valkyries a-comin
In the air their song is comin
They forgot the words! They're hummin!
But they're good enough for me!

We will drive up to Valhalla
Riding Beetles, not Impalas
Singing "Deutschland Uber Alles"
And that's good enough for me!

It was good enough for Loki
It was good enough for Loki
He thinks Thor's a little hokey
And that's good enough for me!

Shall we sing in praise of Loki,
Though he left poor Midgard smokey?
Oh, his sense of humor's hokey,
But he's good enough for me!

All the Gods tore into Loki
Saying Deicide is hokey!
And they threw him in the pokey!
And that's good enough for me!

Good old Thor's the god of thunder
Really helps us get our plunder
Tho his head's still truly dunder
He is good enough for me!

In the halls of Frey and Freyja
All the priestesses will lay ya
If you're good enough, they'll pay ya!
And that's good enough for me!

One-eyed Odin we will follow
And in fighting we will wallow
Till we wind up in Valhallow
Which is good enough for me!

It was good enough for Odin
Though the tremblin' got forbodin'
Then the giants finally strode in,
But it's good enough for me!

Shall we sing a verse for Thor,
Though he leaves the maidens sore?
They always come back for more,
So he's good enough for me!

It was good for Thor and Odin
It was good for Thor and Odin
Grab an ax and get your woad on!
and it's good enough for me!

We will worship now with vigor
The goddess known as Frigga
Tho there are some who don't dig her
She is good enough for me!

If you wanna worship Odin
You don't have to have a coat on
Grab a sword and slap some woad on
And that's good enough for me!

We will sing a verse for Loki
He's the old Norse god of Chaos
Which is why this verse don't
rhyme or scan or nothin'
But it's good enough for me...

Bruja:

Let us sing for Brujaria
Though the blood's a lot less cleaner;
It's not Christian Santaria
So it's good enough for me!

Buddhism:

We will all go to Nirvana
So be sure to mind your manners
Make a left turn at Savannah
And we'll see the Promised Land!

It was good enough for Buddha,
As a god he's kinda cute-a,
And he comes in brass or pewta'
So he's good enough for me!

No one wrote a verse for Buddah
Tho I think they really coulda
And I really think they shoulda
'Cause he's good enough for me!

Oh we all will follow Buddah
Oh we all will follow Buddah
And we'll eat no food but Gouda
Which is Gouda-nuff for me!

We will go and sing "Hosanna"
To our good ol' pal, Gautama,
He will never flim or flam ya',
And that's good enough for me!

We will all go to Nirvana
We will all go to Nirvana
Make a left turn at Urbana
And you'll see the Promised Land!

Cargo Cult & Pacific Islands:

To the tune of Handel's "Largo"
We will hymn the gods of Cargo
'Til they slap on an embargo
And that's good enough for me!

If you get too tired
And you need to get up higher
Just have Pele light your fire!
From her island in the sea!

You can keep your saints with halos,
Your hosannas or dayenus:
Let's throw virgins in volcanoes!
And that's good enough for me!

Christian:

We will worship with the Fundies
With their itchy hair-shirt undies
If they don't bring "Mrs. Grundy,"
Then it's good enough for me!

It was good for old Jehovah
He had a son who was a nova!
Hey there, Mithras! Move on ova'!
Another resurrection Day!

Jerry Falwell thinks he's sav-ed
In a lamb's blood he's been lav-ed
And HE thinks that I'M deprav-ed
But that's good enough for me!

That Bob Larson shrieks and hollers
Fighting demons in his callers
Save his program: SEND YOUR DOLLARS!
And that's good enough for me!

Tho J.C.'s into fish, too,
He's an avatar of Vishnu
So he is welcome here, too,
And that's good enough for me!

Brother Jerry is a cretin
But with all the cash he's gettin'
Lotsa folks'll be forgettin
It's the "Land of the Free!"

Brother Robert's church is Crystal
But all the Bible that he's missed'll
Make you "hotter than a pistol"
But he's good enough for me!

Brother Jim and Sister Tammy
Had a show that was a whammy
But now they are in Miami
Tryin' t'get back on TV!

Whether Low Church or it's High Church
Or it's Pie-Up-In-The-Sky Church
Come on down and visit my Church
'Cause it's good enough for me!

You could join Jehovah's Witness
Running door to door for fitness
Well if you've been blessed with quickness,
Then that's good enough for me

There are those who worship Satan
And are just anticipatin'
Armageddon's conflagratin'
That ain't good enough for me!

Let's all listen up to Jesus
He says rich folks like old Croesus
Will be damned until Hell freezes
And that don't sound good to me!

Oh we'll all be Fundamental
And be Holy Testamental
And never Transcendental
And that's good enough for me!

We will finally pray to Jesus
From our sins we hope he frees us
Eternal life he guarantees us
And that's good enough for me!

Anytime that I start hearin'
"Jesus loves you" I start leerin'
Maybe so, but not like Brian *
Which is good enough for me!

Brother Oral's in his tower,
Trusting in the Lord's power
Getting richer by the hour,
Now he's got the ransom fee!

Brother Earnest is a healer
And not QUITE a wheeler-dealer -
More a jumper and a squealer
So he's good enough for me!

Then there's good ol' Brother Billy
Bringing souls in willy-nilly.
All his trips are kinda silly,
But he's good enough for me!

And the Romans said of Jesus
"Lets kill him, he don't please us"
"But the Atheists will tease us"
And that's good enough for me

And let's not forget Pelagius
Though some call him outrageous
He is pious and courageous
And he's good enough for me!

Classical Paganism:

We will go to worship Zeus
Though his morals are quite loose
He gave Leda quite a goose
And he's good enough for me!

We will pray to Father Zeus
In his temple we'll hang loose
Eating roast beef au jus,
And that's good enough for me!

Shall we sing a verse for Venus,
Of the Gods she is the meanest,
Cause she bit me on my...elbow!
And it's good enough for me!

We will venerate old Bacchus
Drinking beer and eating tacos
Til you've tried it please don't knock us
'Cause it's good enough for me!

Let us raise a toast to Bacchus,
We will raise a royal ruckus,
Then we'll lay us down and f**k us
That's good enough for me!

Diana is a little spikey
And she is a little dyke-ey
You don't have to be a Psych-e
To know that's right for me!

We will worship with Poseidon
We will meet him when the tide's in
All the maidens he will ride in
Then he'll give 'em all to me!

All the hunters start convergin'
When Diana is emergin'
It's too bad she's still a virgin
But there's still hope left for me!

And what about this Bacchus,
Who lives just to raise a ruckus?
Loosens women so they'll f**k us,
Well, that's good enough for me!

We will all see Aphrodite
Though she's pretty wild and flighty
She will meet us in her nightie
And she's good enough for me!

Oh we will go and worship Pan,
'cause he just don't give a damn!
Grab a woman or a man,
And that's good enough for me!

Was a time, so I've heard tell, a
Fine and promising young fella
Gave his all to serve Cybele
But that's damn well not for me!

We'll sing praises to Apollo
Where the Sun-God leads, I'll follow
From Ionia to Gaul-o
And that's good enough for me!

We will have a mighty Party
In the honor of Astarte
Grab your chiton - don't be tardy
'Cause she's good enough for me!

In his dancing Pan will lead them
When his pipes call we will heed them
In truth though, he don't need them
He's more than enough for me!

It was good enough for Venus
She'd have sighed if she'd of seen us
Letting morals come between us
And she's good enough for me!

There's one thing that I do know
Zeus' favorite is Juno
She's the best at doing...you know!
And that's good enough for me!

It was good enough for Cupid
It was good enough for Cupid
His wings look kind of stupid
But that's good enough for me!

Let's all drink to Dionysus
Wine and women beyond prices!
He made a Maenad out of my Sis!
And that's good enough for me!

There are those who, when they've got e-
Normous problems that are knotty
They just take them to Hecate
And that's good enough for me!

In the church of Aphrodite
She's a mighty righteous sightie,
The Priestess wears a see through nightie
And she's good enough for me

You can dance and wave the thyrsos
And sing lots of rowdy verses
Till the neighbors holler curses,
And that's good enough for me!

We will sing for great Diana
Who will teach of love and honor
But you really gotta wanna!
'Cause she's tough enough for me!

We went off to worship Venus
By the Gods! You should have seen us!
Now the Clinic has to screen us...
But that's good enough for me!

It was good enough for Sappho
With her lady on her lap-o
She put Lesbos on the map-o
With her pagan poetry!

When we worship Bacchus
The ethanol will sock us
We'll all get good and raucous
And that's good enough for me!

We'll sing praises to Apollo;
Where the Sun God leads we'll follow
('Though his head's a little hollow)
He's good enough for me!

Don't neglect that shrine of Zeus'
Tho he's lost his vital juices
The old boy still has his uses
And he's good enough for me!

We will all bow to Hephaestus
As a blacksmith he will test us
'Cause his balls are pure asbestos
So he's good enough for me!

There is room enough in Hades
For lots of criminals and shadies
And disreputable ladies,
And they're good enough for me!

And to help things get real raucous
The priests of Pan and Bacchus
Will hold a f***ing contest!
And that's all right with me!

We all worshipped Dionysus
'Till we ran into a crisis:
The bar had raised its prices;
That's not good enough for me!

There's that lusty old Priapus
He's just itching to unwrap us.
(He'd do more to us than tap us
And that's good enough for me!)

Pan's pipes got plugged last summer
And it really was a bummer
Finally had to call a plumber!
But he's good enough for me!

Now Danae was sweet as flowers,
She was into golden showers;
And that showed her Zeus' power
And that's good enough for me!

We will sing our staves to Venus
We will sing our staves to Venus
Tho I think this rhyme is heinous
But it's good enough for me!

Let us dance with Dionysus
And get drunk on wine and spices
The Christians call them "vices"
But they're good enough for me!

We will venerate old Hermes
With his staff entwined with wormies
Warding off the nasty germies
And that's good enough for me!

We will all bow down to Venus
As we dance upon Mt. Zenos
We will worship with our...voice
And that's good enough for me!

We all worship Aphrodite,
And Her sister bold Astarte,
They both throw a lovely party,
And that's just fine with me!

Confucianism

Let us read works of Confucius
As we walk through Massachusetts
In white robes that freeze our tushes
But it's good enough for me!

We used to study old Confucius
As we sat there on our tushes
We're learning but don't push us
And that's good enough for me

Cthulhu:

We will worship mighty Cthulhu
H. P. Lovecraft's big old hoodoo
(1930's fiction voodoo...)
But that's good enough for me!

Let us sing to Lord Cthuhlu
Don't let Lovecraft try to fool you
Or the Elder Gods WILL rule you
And that's good enough for me!

Of the Old Ones, none is vaster
Even Cthulhu's not his master
I refer to the unspeakable *
and that's good enough for me!

And for those who follow Cthulhu
We have really got a lulu:
Drop a bomb on Honolulu!
'Cause that's good enough for you!

We will worship Great Cthulhu,
We will worship Great Cthulhu,
And we'll feed him Mr. Sulu
'Cause that's good enough for me!

We will sacrifice to Yuggoth
We will sacrifice to Yuggoth
Burn a candle for Yog-Soggoth
And the Goat With a Thousand Young

Well it's good enough for *
He's a mighty kinky master
When you pray he goes much faster
And that's good enough for me!

Let's go worship Great Cthulhu,
And run naked like a Zulu,
You and me and Mr. Sulu,
And that's good enough for me!

* - well, do YOU want to say it?

Discordianism:

Let us sing to old Discordia
Cause it's sure she's never bored ya
And if she's good enough for ya
Then she's good enough for me!

If your rising sign is Aries
You'll be taken by the Fairies
Meet the Buddah in Benares
where he'll hit you with a pie!

We will sing a verse for Eris
(Golden apples for the fairest!)
Though she sometimes likes to scare us
But she's good enough for me!

Of Great Murphy much is spoken
For his Law shall not be broken
It's not pretty when he's woken
Things go wrong for you and me!

If your god of choice is Squat
Well then trendy, man, you're not!
But you'll get a parking spot!
And that's good enough for me!

Let us do our thing for Eris
Goddess of the discord there is
Apple's golden, it's not ferrous
And that's good enough for me!

Let us praise the Holy Fool
For he's breaking all the rules
Holds you up to ridicule,
And that's good enough for me!

(The Almighty) Dollar

Oh, the dollar is our Savior
If we spend Her or we save Her
She controls all our behavior
There's not enough for me!

There are those who scream and holler
And get hot under the collar
For their god, Almighty Dollar,
Who is good enough for me!

Call Him God, or call him Allah
The priest will take your dollah
Easy living from -your- follah-
-wers, but sorry, -not- from me!

Druids:

We will worship like the Druids,
Drinking strange fermented fluids,
Running naked through the woo-ids,
Coz that's good enough for me!

In Pwyll's hall you will be welcome
But he's not at home too often
Spends all his time in Annwyfn
And that's good enough for me!

I'll go get my golden sickle
And I'll wear it where it tickles
It ain't used for cuttin' pickles!
And it's good enough for me!

Egyptian:

Let us sing the praise of Horus
As our fathers did before us
We're the New Egyptian Chorus
And we sing in harmony!

We will venerate Bubastis
We will venerate Bubastis
If you want in, then just ast us!
'cause that's good enough for me!

Let us all now worship Ra
And take care of our Ka
We'll all sit round and go "Ah-h-h!"
Which is good enough for me!

Here's an invitation for us
All to go and worship Horus
Doff your clothes and join the chorus
And that's good enough for me!

When we all bowed down to Nuit
There was really nothin' to it
(Alex Sanders made me do it...)
But that's good enough for me!

We will pray with those Egyptians
Build pyramids to put our crypts in
Cover subways with inscriptions,
which is good enough for me...!

We will all do praise to Horus
In an old Egyptian chorus
If there's something in it for us
Then it's good enough for me!

We will venerate Bubastis
Cause my cat walked up and ast us
(Now the cat box is DISASTROUS!)
But it's good enough for me!

Fictional Gods, Demons Amd Heroes:

Here's to those who copy Conan
Here's to those who copy Conan
They're just Followers of Onan
And that's good enough for me!

There are followers of Conan.
And you'll never hear 'em groanin'
Followed Crom up to his throne(in)
And it's good enough for me!

Azahoth is in his Chaos
Azahoth is in his Chaos
Now if only he don't sway us
That is good enough for me!

We will worship Holy Ford
Beta, Delta, Gamma, Lord
But the Alphas might get bored
A Brave New World for you and me!

Let us note the might of Ils
With a thousand or more quills
By the light that from him spills
He is good enough for me!

The late return of the Prophet Zarquon
Caused his followers to hearken
As the Universe went dark on
All of you and me!

We will sing of Foul the Render,
Who's got Drool Rockworm on a bender
In his cave in Kiril Threndor-
They're both too much for me!

Of Lord Shardik you must beware;
To please him you must swear;
'Cause enraged he's a real Bear,
And that's good enough for me!

We will sing of Iluvatur,
Who sent the Valar 'cross the water
To lead Morgoth to the slaughter
And that's just fine with me!

We will sing the Jug of Issek,
And of Fafhrd his chief mystic,
Though to thieving Mouser will stick,
And that's good enough for me!

We'll invoke the blessed Camber
And the Unicorn of Amber
And the wizard Deliamber
They're good enough for me!

It was good enough for Cthulhu
Who'd eat me and who'd eat you, too;
If it's good enough for Cthulhu
Then it's good enough for me

Hindu:

There are some that call it folly
When we worship Mother Kali.
She may not be very jolly
But she's good enough for me!

As the goddess Kali dances
With her worshippers in trances
You can learn some Hindu stances
And that's good enough for me!

We will go to worship Kali
She will help us in our folly
She'd be quite an armful, golly!
And she's good enough for me!

I will wait till four-armed Kali
Drags me through that lonesome valley
She's disgusting act-u-all-y
But She's good enough for me!

Islamic:

We will all bow down to Allah
For he gave his loyal follow
Ers the mighty petro-dollah
And that's good enough for me!

Warriors for Allah
Are sure to have a gala
Time in old Valhalla
And that's good enough for me!

Jewish:

If you think that you'll be sav-ed
If you think that you'll be sav-ed
If you follow Mogen David
Then that's good enough for me!

Let us worship old Jehovah
All you other gods move ovah
Cause the one God's takin' over
And it's good enough for me!

Some guys have a circumcision
On account of their religion,
An embarrassing incision
Cut just ENOUGH from me!

Let us celebrate Jehovah
Who created us "ab ova"
He'll be on tonight on "Nova"
'cause he's good enough for me!

Kahbahla:

We will read from the Kabahlah
We will read from the Kabahlah
It won't get us to Valhalla
But it's good enough for me!

We will read from the Cabala.
Quote the Tree of Life mandala
It won't get you in Valhalla,
Yet it's good enough for me!

Krishna:

We will all sing Hare Krishna
We will all sing Hare Krishna
It's not mentioned in the Mishna
But it's good enough for me!

Hare Krishna gets a laugh on
When he sees me dressed in saffron
With my hair that's only half on
But that's good enough for me!

I was singing Hari Rama
With my friend the Dalai Lama
'Til they dumped us in the slammer
But that's good enough for me!

Middle Eastern Pagan:

I'll sing some songs to Lilith,
Not so young, and not so girlish,
and She's always PMS-ish,
but She's good enough for me!

Lilith wears a lacy nightie
And She is a little flighty
She will get you all excite-y
She's wet-dream enough for me!

We will all bow down to Dagon
We will all bow down to Dagon
He still votes for Ronald Reagan
And that's good enough for me!

Let us worship sweet Eninni
Let us worship sweet Eninni
In a skimpy string bikini
And that's good enough for me!

We will go to worship Lillith
Grab your cup, step up and fill it
Tho 'ware she don't make you spill it!
And that's good enough for me!

Oh the Philistines abound
Oh the Philistines abound
They had the biggest Baals around
And that's good enough for me!

We will have a mighty orgy
in the honor of Astarte
it'll be a mighty party
and it's good enough for me!

We will sing to Lady Isis
She'll stand by us in a crisis
And She hasn't raised Her prices
And She's good enough for me!

We will all bow down to Enlil
We will all bow down to Enlil
Pass your Cup and get a refill!
With bold Gilgamesh the Brave!

Oh the ancient goddess Nerthus
From herself the Earth did birth us
And I wonder: are we worth us?
But she's good enough for me!

Well Dimuzi's on vacation
He'll be back when spring awakens
There will be such recreation
There will be enough for me!

Mithraism:

We will sing a song of Mithras
Let us sing a song of Mithras
But there is no rhyme for Mithras!
Still he's good enough for me!

We will all be saved by Mithras
We will all be saved by Mithras
Slay the Bull and play the zithras
On that Resurrection Day!

Moonies

We will worship Sun Myung Moonie
Though we know he is a goonie
All our money he'll have soonly
And that's good enough for me!

New Age:

Oh, our Spirits will awaken
Oh, our Spirits will awaken
Watch the Universe a-quakin'
Which is Gurdijeff to me!

Timmy Leary we will sing to
And the things that he was into
(Well, at least it wasn't Shinto)
And that's good enough for me!

In the sky I hear a hummin'
It's the UFO's a-comin'
That's not banjos that they're strummin
But it's good enough for me!

Well I'm tired of Ronald Reagan,
He's too square to be a pagan,
Let's all vote for Carl Sagan!
He's good enough for me!

I'll arise at early mornin'
When the Sun gives me the warnin'
That the Solar Age is dawnin'
And that's good enough for me!

Just like Carlos Castenada
Just like Carlos Castenada
It'll get you sooner or later
And that's good enough for me!

New World Pagan:

Thanks to great Quetzacoatl
And his sacred axolotl
And his gift of chocolatl
And please pass some down to me!

Praise to Popacatapetl
Just a tiny cigarette'll
Put him in terrific fettle
So he's good enough for me!

Now watch out for the Maya's,
They might really try to fry ya,
Sacrifice people, not papaya's,
Just as long as its not me!

Quetzacoatl's flyin'
With the Toltec and the Mayan
And the mushrooms he's been buyin'
Are good enough for me!

Some folks pray to the Great Spirit
Most folks just cannot get near it
So they hate it and they fear it
But it's good enough for me!

Some folks worship the Kachinas
Some folks worship the Kachinas
They look like "deus ex machinas"
But they're good enough for me!

Montezuma liked to start out
Rites by carrying a part out
That would really tear your heart out,
But it's good enough for me!

And when old Quetzacoatl
Found a virgin he could throttle
And put her heart into a bottle
It was good enough for me.

Aztec:

We will worship Xochipilli
Though it might be a bit silly
Running naked makes me chilly
But it's good enough for me!

Oh, there's none like Huizlipochtli
For destroyin' people tot'ly
Best to worship -him- remotely!
But he's good enough for me!

I have gotten in the way-o
Walkin' with the Monster Slayer
He is worthy of a prayer
And he's good enough for me!

We will worship Xipe-Totec
Tho it is a little lo-tech
It is not a bit ero-tic
But it's good enough for me!

The Kachinas of the Hopi
Dance about and some act dopey
They don't leave you feelin' mopey
So they're good enough for me!

Scientology

L. Ron Hubbard liked precision
And he founded a religion
That has caught a lot of pigeons
And it's good enough for me!

In matters Dianetic
You need not get frenetic
Make your Engrams copacetic
And that's good enough for me!

Shinto:

There are some who practice Shinto
There are some who practice Shinto
There's no telling what WE'RE into!
but that's good enough for me!

I don't really go for Shinto
It's just something I'm not into
Tho I guess I could begin to
'Cause it's good enough for me!

In Japan they thought it neato
When they worshipped Hirohito
But that didn't sit with SEATO
So it never more will be!

Thelema:

Uncle Crowley was a dreamer
At the Abbey of Thelemer
But his magic is a screamer,
So it's good enough for me!

There are those who follow Crowley
Tho the stuff that he held holy
Turn your brain to guacamole
But he's good enough for me!

It was good enough for Crowley
With his sacraments unholy
Who smoked pot and ate some moly
And it's good enough for me!

When the clouds they are a'rumbling
And the thunder is a'grumbling
Then it's Crowley that you're mumbling
And it's good enough for me!

Let us call an Elemental
For a temporary rental
Just as long as it is gentle
It is good enough for me!

Voodoo:

There are people into voodoo
Africa has raised a hoodoo
Just one little doll will do you
And it's good enough for me!

There are people into Voodoo
There are people into Voodoo
I know I do, I hope you do!
And it's good enough for me!

If you're really into dancing
And you wanna try some trancing
Then the Voodoo gods are prancing
And that's good enough for me!

Wicca And General Neo-Pagan:

Well, she raised an awful flurry
When she made the scholars worry
Thank the Gods for Margaret Murray!
She is good enough for me!

It was good enough for Granny
She could throw a double-whammy
That would knock you on your fanny
And she's good enough for me!

With the aid of my athame
I can throw a "double-whammy"
(And can slice and dice salami!)
So it's good enough for me!

There will be a lot of lovin'
When we're meetin in our Coven
Quit yer pushin and yer shovin'
So there's room enough for me!

Well the Christians all are humming
Cause they say their God is coming,
Our God came three times this evening
And that's good enough for me!

When old Gerald got it goin'
When old Gerald got it goin'
All that hidin' turned to showin'
And that's good enough for me!

It's not good enough for Reagan
It's not good enough for Reagan
He's too square to be a Pagan!
And that's good enough for me!

Meeting at the Witching Hour
By the Bud, and Branch and Flower
Folks are raising up the Power
And that's where I want to be!

We will worship with the witches
'Cause we're rowdy sons-of-bitches
And they scratch us where it itches
And that's good enough for me!

We will gather at our saunas
When the spirit comes upon us
To perform the Rites of Faunus
And that's good enough for me!

Some folks worship all of Nature
Tho they love to taunt and bait-cher
They're just funnin', they don't hate-cher
And they're good enough for me!

Zarathustrian:

We will pray to Zarathustra
And we'll pray just like we usta
I'm a Zarathustra boosta!
And that's good enough for me!

I pray to Ahura-Mazda
He's one god who sure won't pause ta
Pound some heads when given cause ta
Which is good enough for me!

It could be that you're a Parsi
It could be that you're a Parsi
Don't need a ticket; you get in free
And that's good enough for me!

I can't rhyme Ahura Mazda,
I'll praise the man who tries ta
Then I'll wait for Barak Raz ta
And that's good enough for me!

Unclassifiable Verses And Unknown Ghods:

We will go down to the temple
Sit on mats woven of hemp-le
Try to set a good "exemple"
And that's good enough for me!

Let us watch Ka-ka-pa-ull
Frolic in her swimming pool
Subjecting chaos to her rule
And that's all right with me!

They revered ancient ENIAC
And sacrificed to UNIVAC
Now we sing our chants on VAX pack
And that's good enough for me!

When you worship Rusto
Treat your friends with lust-o
Pursue your faith with gusto!
And that's good enough for me!

There are those who worship no gods
For they think that there are low odds
That the god-seers aren't drunk sods
But they're good enough for me!

Where's the gong gone? I can't find it
I think Northwoods is behind it!
For they've always been cymbal-minded
And they're good enough for me!

Some folks pray to the Orishas
Tho their humor can be vishas
When they grant your stupid wishas
But they're good enough for me!

There are those who worship science
And some would send 'em to the lions
Without 'em we'd have no appliance
So they're good enough for me

We will all bow down to Gozer
Priestess did it with that Joser
Cross the streams, and there she goes, sir
And that's good enough for me!

We will worship Christian Jesus
And do just like John Paul pleases
That we will...when Hades freezes!
And that's good enough for me!

I have got a strange religion
I will worship Walter Pidgeon
Is he sacred? Just a smidgen!
But it's good enough for me!

Drink to FUFLUNS he's just fine
The Etruscan god of wine
This verse doesn't really rhyme
But it's good enough for me!

John, Paul, George and Ringo
We will worship playing Bingo
We will listen to them sing-o
And that's good enough for me!

The Obligatory Last Verse

It's the opera written for us!
We will all join in the chorus!
It's the opera about Boris,
Which is Godunov for me!

I suppose that this last song has turned you into a newt by now. You may not realize that it happened, 'cause that's just how that sort of thing seems to work. You need to put a carrot on your nose and find a duck, and weigh it. Then you'll be OK again.


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